When Quitting Is the Harder, Better Choice
On learning to let “grit” go.
Angela Chen (@chengela) is a science journalist and writer. Her reporting and essays have also been published in The New York Times, The Wall Street Journal, The Guardian, The Atlantic, Paris Review, Aeon Magazine, Pacific Standard, Smithsonian, Hazlitt, Electric Literature, and more. She is the author of Ace, on asexuality, from Beacon Press.
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I learned to reevaluate the meaning of ‘normal’ in relationships, and also my habit of reflexively turning to data.
It can be easy to confuse real emotion with the shiny drama enfolding it. Sometimes grand gestures are signs of grand feeling—sometimes they’re not.
Remain forever hungry, or enjoy the tried-and-true? Sometimes, I learned, it’s okay to double down on the life you have.
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It is the act of recording all this data that has helped me step away from identifying so strongly with it.
“Though desire for sex is considered one of our four primal drives, I lack such a desire almost completely.”