I Let Go of My Faith When I Came Out—But I Still Believe in Jennifer Knapp
What was I getting out shame, anyway? So I walked away from it all: going to church, reading scripture, prayer, even the Christian music I loved so much.
KansasAnd reaching out my weary hand / I pray that you’ll understand / you’re the only one who’s faithful to me
Present your requests to God, and the peace of God, which transcends all understanding, will guard your heart and mind.
You’re the only one who’s faithful to me.
the peace that passes all understanding in a world crazed with fearKansas
Create in me a clean heart, O God / Renew a steadfast spirit within me / To my prayers you’ve always given heed
Well it’s time to get down on my knees and pray / Lord, undo me / put away my flesh and bone, til you own / the Spirit through me
The AdvocateChristianity Today
Even though they say we have fallen, / doesn’t mean that I won’t do it twice / Given every second chance, I’d choose again / to be with you tonight
I’ve never been much for the baring of soul in the presence of any man
So turn on the light and reveal all the glory / I am not afraid, / To bare all my weakness, knowing in meekness / I have a kingdom to gain
Turn on the light and reveal all the glory / I am not afraid
I can’t imagine you with a manI can’t imagine you as religiousI can’t imagine you believing that shit
Turn on the light and reveal all the glory I am not afraid.
Jeanna Kadlec is the author of the forthcoming memoir-in-essays This I Know: A Memoir of Heresy (Mariner Books, 2022). Her writing has appeared in Longreads, ELLE, Glamour, NYLON, O the Oprah Magazine, Allure, LitHub, and more. You can subscribe to her newsletter, Astrology for Writers, and find her on Twitter here.
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