Bodies

What Bird Watching Gave Me After My Miscarriage

It was satisfying to see those robins, sparrows, and starlings, because they were still with us. They had stayed.

Sep 19, 2018
I Stopped Dyeing My Gray Hair as an Act of Resistance

Beauty and its pursuit can be art, a delight, a terrific party. But a party you must attend every day isn’t a party at all. It’s an unpaid job.

Sep 06, 2018
Watching Home Movies After My Double Mastectomy

Inside her small body lives every answer to every obstacle. No maps are necessary. She is the map.

Sep 05, 2018
In Pursuit of Fertile Ground: Continuing IVF When the Odds Are Against You

I am at the nether reaches of my fertility, curious as to what I can still grow. This remains a shock.

Jul 31, 2018
Schrödinger’s Ovaries

“What I know is this: Some part of me, however small, is already dead. I live around it.”

May 31, 2018
In Defense of Fast Girls Who Just Want to Dance

“We were free and naïve enough to believe we could navigate the terrain of men’s hunger and their hands unscathed.”

May 25, 2018
Missing Hope: A Trio of Miscarriages, and What Happened After

I have been afraid most days of my life, which is what anxiety is, and the months of this pregnancy have been the most anxious of my life.

May 09, 2018
Talent Isn’t Enough When You’re a Fat Ballerina

“What does it mean when your body is your art? Can a thicker brush not make just as beautiful strokes?”

May 03, 2018
Silence Is Not Consent: On #MeToo and Neurodivergent Survivors of Sexual Assault

I hope the voices of people who haven’t necessarily had the words when they needed them can also be heard.

Feb 26, 2018
On Miscarriage, Motherhood, and Wanting to Control What You Cannot See

On the day when two pink lines stared up at me, I wondered which set of events I had set in motion. A baby? Or not a baby?

Feb 15, 2018
Strangers to Our Teeth: What We Judge When We Judge “Bad Teeth”

My bad teeth are slowly shrinking my world. They are not of my body; they haunt my body.

Jan 30, 2018
Scarred

Even when I think I am at peace, when I think I have healed, I find myself still thinking of my scar.

Jan 18, 2018
Men Who Are Ready to Devour the Young

My changing body made me the object of stares and comments from men far older than my father.

Disfiguration: How to Locate the Soul in Your New Face

Here is how the story of your new face begins.

Dec 21, 2017
Guidelines to a Safe Abortion in Nigeria

“Culture should change as people do because people should define culture.”

Dec 05, 2017
Men Stop Me Running

At fifty yards, I wave like I see someone I know. Ten feet away, I flash my pepper spray.

Nov 13, 2017
How I Felt Watching the Election as a Survivor of Sexual Assault

On Election Night, I thought again of the boy who assaulted me. When had I finally stopped blaming myself?

Nov 08, 2017
When the Worst Body-Shaming Comes from Those You Love

“Have my friends and family been hoping for a new me? Have they all been waiting for a transformation?”

Nov 01, 2017
Hunger Inside My Queer Body

“I wanted to be like that: hard and boney, a body full of fuck-you’s.”

Oct 17, 2017
Art Therapy Before Surgery

“They did it in one fell swoop, cut out the whole tangle of lymph nodes in my neck, preemptively, ear to collarbone to ear.”

Sep 26, 2017