When Sleeping in the Room with a Dead Body Is Your Best Option
I do not want to be tire. My life is tire.
As told to Jessica Goudeau
I do not want to be tire. My life is tire. sometimes I prefer no to live and disappear myself.
We are having a quiz today. We are going to disect a rat today again which is horrible.
Things are getting bad this last days. They need to get better instead it is bad. I do not like my grades to go down but perhaps I do not care.
Why! Why? We have to know people that support us. But then they are gone. gone. Why people that we like have to leave us. I want to stop thinking about this and continue with my life. That is better. I think perhaps continue with my little life.
E.L.’s story is featured in the animated documentary “A Line Birds Cannot See” and she is currently working on a memoir. Because she and her relatives live with the worry of deportation, her name and a few identifying details have been withheld at her request.
Jessica Goudeau is the author of AFTER THE LAST BORDER (forthcoming, Viking 2020), a narrative nonfiction book about refugee resettlement in the US. She has written for The Atlantic, The Washington Post, Teen Vogue, The Los Angeles Times, and other places. She has a PhD in Poetry and Translation Studies from the University of Texas. In most of her writing, she partners with displaced people to tell their stories with dignity while protecting their identities. Find out more: jessicagoudeau.com and @jessica_goudeau
Enter your email address to receive notifications for author Jessica Goudeau
Confirmation link sent to your email to add you to notification list for author Jessica Goudeau
More by this author
From the Congo to a refugee camp in Kenya to resettlement in Austin, TX—this is the story of a doctor who is starting over.
I told him clearly in that interview: “I am here because I’m afraid I will be killed in my country. I cannot return to Guatemala. I will die if I do.” The immigration officer acted like he did not understand.
More in this series
“Most cultures have a female monster who preys on pregnant women and children. In ancient Greece, her name was Lamia.”
How many days had we spent asking the same questions of God or doctors? How long had we wrestled with conditions that didn’t yet exist?
My eating disorder dictated my relationship to food. Then I moved to Wyoming, whose unforgiving landscape reminded me: We eat food to survive.