How I'm Learning to Manage Rage as a Bipolar Woman
Are these the only two stories? The one, where you defeat your monster, and the other, where you succumb to it?
Jami Nakamura Lin writes the Catapult column "The Monsters in the Mirror." Her essays have appeared or are forthcoming in the New York Times, Electric Literature, Passages North, and other publications. She was featured in the anthology What God is Honored Here? (University of Minnesota Press, 2019).
She is the recipient of a 2016 Creative Artists Fellowship from the Japan-US Friendship Commission and the National Endowment of the Arts and a 2015 Walter Dean Myers Award from We Need Diverse Books.
Twitter: @jaminlin / jaminakamuralin.com
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Perhaps the certainty that you are not the monster—that no matter what you do, you will never become the monster—is what gives rise to monstrous behavior.
I do not have flesh; I only have ghosts. In this story, the dead are only what I say they are. Does this make them less real?
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For many people, they smell White Diamonds and, instantly, they melt. They remember their mother’s indulgent laugh; the arms that held them.