Breaking Up with Your Best American Girl
Since voicing my intention to transition, I’ve been revisiting my favorite love-as-a-woman songs and reorienting myself within them.
This is Formation Jukebox, a column by Lio Min on being in transition and the music that helps them make sense of it all.
I guess I couldn’t help trying to be the best American girl
I think of those girl friends now, almost all of whom live on in my life as strangers, and feel a deep shame. We were so buoyant with affection and tenderness; we were so gifted at twisting small blades in each other’s backs under the petty spell of teenage courtship. I have no trouble meeting up with former guy friends, but I have a much tougher time talking to the girls, who are now women.
Don’t wait for me / I can’t comeYour mother wouldn’t approve of how my mother raised me / But I do, I think I do / And you’re an all-American boy / I guess I couldn’t help trying to be your best American girl
You’re the one / You’re all I ever wanted / I think I’ll regret this.
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When he asked me how to say “I love you” in Japanese, I translated linguistically, but mistranslated culturally.