Why My Father Could Not Embrace His Name
From his youth until late in life he was able to “pass,” his heritage all but invisible until he mentioned his name.
This is Invisible History, a column in which Lauren Alwan chronicles family stories of heritage and belonging and the complexities of her bicultural experience.

M

f
Lauren Alwan’s essay is included in the anthology published by Catapult in February 2020.
Fiction and essays in the O. Henry Prize Stories 2018, The Southern Review, ZYZZYVA (Notable, Best American Essays 2016), Alaska Quarterly Review, StoryQuarterly, Bellevue Literary Review, The Rumpus, The Millions, Nimrod International, and others. Prose editor at the museum of americana, staff contributor @LitStack. Follow her on Twitter at @lauren_alwan www.laurenalwan.com
Enter your email address to receive notifications for author Lauren Alwan
Success!
Confirmation link sent to your email to add you to notification list for author Lauren Alwan
More by this author
Searching for Family History in My Grandmother’s Embroidery
Together, the photograph and the needlework clearly told a story, one beyond any we knew.
“Are You Really Sisters?”
The only means for talking about our mixed heritage was the ‘adorable’ contrast between ‘the girls,’ as we were called: one light, one dark; same parents, different skin.
More in this series
The Stepmother or the Saint: How Fairy Tales Depict the Different Facets of Motherhood
In fairy tales, the only good mother is a dead one.
What If Accessibility Was Also Inclusive?
It’s hard to articulate what it feels like to spend a lifetime being told that you are not allowed. Not always in so many words, but in gestures, in spaces, in thoughtlessness.
In Defense of the Worst Cooks in America
The soundstage’s kitchen didn’t have a dishwasher, so he was forced to make dishwasher salmon in the oven instead—like some kind of hack.