All the Things I’ve Loved to Death
Am I ever going to know where I hope to escape to? I understand that I’m trying escape from reality, but I’m still not clear on what the destination is.
I’m your number one fan. Can I please come to your factory sometime?
You feel like shit right now. But it’s not just now. You feel like shit all the time. Why?Drinking.
Is that true?
No, you’re fine.
Wow,I have no desire to escape myself today
throughThe only way out is through.
The only way out is threw. And thru. And through.
I am so powerful now. I am doing so well nowI can do anything now.
No more food, it’s almost time to go further back home, back to the place that was home before home was a place.
The World Is on Your Plate: An Eating Meditation.
Do you want to go through the drive-through again?
Look! The pain is on the outside now! Can you see it?
Swan Huntley is a writer living in Los Angeles. Her novels include Getting Clean With Stevie Green, The Goddesses, and We Could Be Beautiful. She earned her MFA at Columbia University and has received fellowships from MacDowell and Yaddo. Her essays have appeared on Salon, The Rumpus, and Autostraddle, among others.
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I have been afraid most days of my life, which is what anxiety is, and the months of this pregnancy have been the most anxious of my life.